Should You Let Your Son Build Legos At The Breakfast Table?
Aug 23 2011
My son got a Lego City Helicopter Transporter (Amazon) set for his birthday, and he really got into building it this past weekend. He was so engrossed that he brought all the little pieces to the breakfast table one morning. I told him to wait until we finished breakfast, but he said he simply couldn’t and that he had to finish building this one little section. He got his sister to help him bring all the little pieces from the couch, where he was working on it, to the table. I wasn’t sure what to do. On one hand, he listened to me and came to eat breakfast when I asked him to, on the other hand he didn’t buy into my statements that he might spill milk on them. His response was that he would be very careful and not spill milk on them.
I wondered if I should let him do it since we usually eat breakfast pretty quickly and that morning we were having cereal. So after a few times of me telling him to wait, his excitement and focus on building the helicopter & truck, me rationalizing that he’s not going to be doing that when he’s 19 (well who knows what he’ll be doing or eating in college), and finally wondering if this wishy washiness on my part was going to do long term damage to him, me or his sister, I just let him do it. It was all over in 10-15 minutes. His sister was conspiring by handing him extremely tiny Lego pieces as if he was a surgeon and she his assistant because I think she was a bit curious to see if he would get milk on his tiny (did I mention how small they are and how easily they could drop into a cereal bowl?) Lego pieces (as was I). I secretly wished he might so I could tell him “I told you so,” but at the same time I wished harder that he wouldn’t so he could feel justified in his stand. No pieces got lost and none got milk on them and both he and his sister were pleased they finished building it. That poor lucky boy…he’s going to be one of the few who gets the best of his momma…or sends her to the funny farm. 🙂
You know, the parent in me says “No Lego at the Table”, but the boy in me says “But Mom…..”
Look back at when we were kids, I’m sure there were many things we did that drove our parents crazy. And what about riding around in car with no seatbelts on, standing on the back seat while dad drove to relatives on vacation?
Times have changed and our perception of “safety” changes with it. You can never go wrong by trying to be the best parent, encourage your kids and keep a watchful eye. You never know, he might just be the next famous engineer or architect!
Yup thats a tough one, common to many a Lego parent (after all they are educational aren’t they!) :0)
We have such a tight schedule in the morning and my son has brought models to the breakfast table in the past and then procrastinated/drifted/wasn’t connecting with the family for 10 minutes so he isn’t allowed anymore.
I guess you really need to feel what is right for you and stick with that. If needs be, find another time during the day that is “totally Lego” however small a period of time it is.
Cheers
Inger
He’s lucky to have such a patient mom who understands and respects the ‘engineer’ mind!
My kids have been told since the time they could sit up “No toys at the table or the toys will ‘disappear’ (at least temporarily)” Of course mommy has to respect this rule too and i’m not allowed to bring my laptop or any other ‘toy’ to the table either 🙂
Thanks for sharing Aruni!
First, I think you’re very lucky that this is the first time you’ve had to deal with this. Toys at the table have been a part of almost every meal until the age of 4 at our house. I actually thought it went away (it did for my eldest around 4, so just assumed so). When they are young, I rationalized that their attention span is so low and it really helps keep them entertained when they have to wait. At restaurants, we often get compliments about how well-behaved they are and they always sit in their seats. I’ve attributed this to having the distraction of the little toys (nothing big). As long as the toy is not causing a major upheaval (think sibling fight) and you have taught enough manners that they know what to do at a friend’s house, I don’t see the harm. Of course, as they get older, you want to make sure you are actually TALKING during meals, but it doesn’t mean it has to be breakfast, lunch, AND, dinner every day. I think I would relish that he’s doing that and not playing video games, which would be a definite no-no. I suppose one could argue what’s the difference, but the kids were working together on a “project” and it sounds innocent enough…this time. I guess the question will be what’s next and whether it can spiral out of control, but just like so many things with parenting, sometimes nothing is a problem until it is one. Good luck! 🙂
@Barry – He just might be a famous engineer. His dad is.
@Lego – like your name. 🙂 He was engaged with us while he was building the lego and telling his sister what he needed, etc.
@dana – it’s always tough with that fine line, but I figured since they don’t do it often, this time would be OK.
@Nicole – my kids had toys to distract them when they were babies and they usually fell on the floor. 🙂 It’s not a common occurrence that they play with toys at the table these days…except for sometimes the iPhone when at restaurants and we are waiting for food…